A Night of Male Bonding by Calic0cat
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Written for Sentinel_thurs Challenge: #125 Male bonding. Short and, well... odd.

Somehow, Simon Banks didn't think that this was quite what Carolyn Plummer had had in mind when she'd suggested that the guys from Major Crimes should take her fiancé out for a night of 'male bonding' while she and her bridesmaids were getting their final dress fittings. Standing just outside the bar's entrance, he stared blankly at his car and hoped that its apparent rocking motion was just a figment of his imagination rather than evidence of certain activities taking place in its backseat.

"Cap'n?"

Simon turned in response to the summons. Removing a slightly mangled cigar from his teeth, he demanded, "What have we got, Detective?"

"The manager I.Ded the kid as Blair Sandburg. He was just arriving for his shift; he's a student at Rainier and he's been bartending here part-time off and on for a couple of years."

"Thank God for small favours," Simon muttered fervently. In a university town like Cascade, the kid's presence in a bar was no guarantee of age, but if he'd been bartending here for that long, he was definitely legal. For drinking *and* for where the spontaneous floorshow appeared to be heading. Underage bonding wasn't supposed to happen, but... "Thirty-plus-year-old offline, unbonded, Sentinels are supposed to stay that way - offline and unbonded," he grumbled. "Everyone knows that."

"Guess somebody forgot to tell Ellison," Brown chuckled.

Simon growled and chomped down on his cigar again, wondering for the thousandth time just what had possessed him to take Ellison into his department. The man was a damn good detective but he was also a pain in the ass, even after Pendergast had gotten him to tone down the attitude a bit. Add in Sentinel issues...

...and the probable need for a new head of Technical Support, once Plummer found out that her fiancé was now her *ex*-fiancé and a happily-bonded Sentinel... a happily *male*-bonded Sentinel...

Most of Simon's poor abused cigar fell to the ground, bitten clean through. Spitting out the last mangled piece, he muttered wearily, "I need a drink."

Looking towards Simon's car, Brown shook his head, still chuckling. "Might be a good idea to take Ellison and his new Guide home first, sir, 'less you've been intendin' to get new shocks anyway..."

Suppressing the urge to growl again, Simon decided, "Good idea. You bring Ellison's truck and take the first watch."

"First watch?"

"Yes, Detective. First watch. Someone has to keep anyone from intruding on the bonding process." Simon crossed his arms and smirked in smug satisfaction at the dawning horror on Brown's face. "Anyone like, say, the Sentinel's ex-fiancee, for example..." he added as he started towards his very definitely rocking car. As he climbed in, carefully adjusting the rearview mirror to ensure that he didn't see what was going on in the backseat and cranking up the radio so that he couldn't hear anything back there either, Simon had just one thought going through his mind.

Having a human crime lab in his department had damn well better be worth it.

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